I’m Not Emotionally Attached To My Mother, Siblings And Extended Family – Internet User Seeks Help

I’m Not Emotionally Attached To My Mother, Siblings And Extended Family – Internet User Seeks Help

According to an internet user…

Good day everyone. This topic shouldn’t be on this Section, but I really need it to gain traffic urgently reason I am doing this here. My apologies.I am from a family of four. The eldest. I hail from Plateau state. I lost my Dad when I was 10yrs. After my dad’s burial, I went to live with a paternal anty who maltreated me so badly that I almost committed Suicide. I was like a slave. You can think of all the dehumanizing treatments in life. I started High sch. No sponsor. Same anty never paid my fees for once, yet I was like a slave to her and her children. Throughout my secondary school, there was NO session that I ever wrote complete exams for 1, 2 and 3rd Terms. I would write maybe 6papers and not write the remaining papers, I will miss the next term’s exams totally and write a few papers the final term of the session due to not paying sch fees. I was so ridiculed & mocked by my classmates cos of the constant embarrassment. As a result of this, I became an introvert. I couldn’t even ask questions in class or socialize with my mates. No friends. My fee was #800 at the time. A private sch. I was so determined to get education & prayed God to pls help me bear whatever I faced at that time. During this period, my mum who is unlettered stayed back in the village with my siblings and had to remarry. I got really pissed and cried myself out when I heard about the marriage cos I had no prior knowledge about it. My mum up till now has NEVER given me anything like Money in my Life. Highest she ever gave me was 1k at once… At a point some person’s even asked me if I still had a Mum particularly whenever I tried to seek help from them.I was undeterred, wrote my WAEC, had 4-Distinctions and 4-credits and a Pass in Geography, then wrote JAMB, scored 220 and got admission to the University. I had to Hussle to pay my fees throughout. I spent 8yrs in the University due to money constraints. My mum never showed much concern. At a point I said I would drop out and to my shock, she said I should do so if I wanted to. Thank God I done with my Degree.During and after NYSC she would always call me almost everyday talking about money. Making demands on me. I was always sending to her cos no matter what, she’s my mum. At a point, I wasn’t responding to her calls for months and never sent money again. She started telling people that I wasn’t calling her or picking her calls or helping her. She also instigated my younger siblings against me and they started disrespecting me. Anyone of us who has money and gives to her at that particular period is who she will become friends with then starts reporting negative things about others to the person that is currently giving her money. Some things would be done and I will never be aware except an outsider tells me. I felt so bad about all these and I decided to stay aloof and estranged from my family. I don’t call except once in a while. My mum has been calling for almost a month now but I haven’t picked cos money will be involved in the conversation and I don’t have now.Pls advise me.The last straw was when I got Mobilized for NYSC and had nothing to even use for transport to the camp. I consulted a cooperative that she belongs in to loan me some money, but did u know that after they accepted to give me the loan the next day, I went back and they started giving me excuses. I later heard from an impeccable memeber of the cooperative that it was my mum that asked them not to grant me the loan. Her reason was that I may not pay back and she didn’t want the responsibility of repaying to fall back on her. Same woman that has never given me any dime. Mind you, she has money to buy the latest Wrappers but can’t help me.She attends almost all the burials in the village even when the deceased isn’t related to her and likes to drink alcohol. I have talked to her about this but she wouldn’t listen.

Frank Cis | September 18, 2023.

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